


Star Light, Star Bright

by machinewithoutfeelings



Series: When You Wish Upon a Star Destroyer [1]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Accidental Baby Acquisition, Babies, Fluff, Hux Has No Chill, M/M, Space Parents, The Force is Whatever We Want it to Be
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-12
Updated: 2016-06-12
Packaged: 2018-07-14 15:42:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7177793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/machinewithoutfeelings/pseuds/machinewithoutfeelings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“Where did you get <b>that</b>?”</i>
</p><p>
  <i>Kylo Ren looked up from the squirming thing wrapped in a yellow blanket, a serene yet unsettling expression on his face. “It is a gift. From the Force.”</i>
</p><p>In which Ren is a surprisingly natural parent, and Hux needs a little adjusting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Star Light, Star Bright

**Author's Note:**

> The softest of soft Kylux. This is sweet and ridiculous.

“Where did you get _that_?”

Kylo Ren looked up from the squirming thing wrapped in a yellow blanket, a serene yet unsettling expression on his face. “It is a _gift_. From the Force.”

“Ren,” Hux said, coming into the room and quickly closing the door behind him, before anyone passing by could see inside. “Ren, that is a baby. A human baby. Where did you get a baby?”

Ren then shushed him. _Shushed him_. “You're being very loud. He's almost asleep. Sit next to me and look at him, Hux. He has your eyes.” 

“Ren, what are you _talking_ about? _Whose baby is that_?”

The baby started to whimper, and maybe Ren was right about him being loud. Ren shifted the baby in his arms so that its head was nestled against his shoulder, bouncing it slightly and patting it on the back. “He's our baby,” Ren said, as if Hux was stupid, and then, to further the insult, he rolled his eyes when Hux mouthed back the words ' _our baby???_ ' at him. “I just said. He's a gift from the Force. I asked for him and now he is here.”

Hux sat down next to his- lover? Boyfriend? _Co-parent?_ His Kylo Ren. Hux sat down next to his Kylo Ren.

“Ren,” he said. “I know you had a...less-than-conventional upbringing. But surely someone took the time to explain to you, you know. The birds and the bees?” Hux felt like dropping his head into his hands. This was a humiliating conversation to be having with another adult. Another adult that he was fucking. “This,” he said, twirling a hand over the child. “Cannot happen. With us. Kriff, Ren, no one was even pregnant.”

“I know how human reproduction works,” Ren snapped. “But you do not understand how the Force works, so please do not condescend to me, Brendol.”

The baby had to have come from somewhere. The most likely culprit was a female trooper with a malfunctioning implant, but how would she have hidden the pregnancy? Where would she have given birth? Looking at the child, Hux could see it looked full-term and healthy enough. He needed to take it to the medbay. If he could get a full DNA scan, he could run it against the records of every trooper and officer on board the Finalizer and get some answers.

“Have you taken him to be seen?” Hux asked, trying to get a decent look at the child's face. It was lying too snugly against Ren's chest. “You should take him to the medbay. Get him checked out.”

“He's healthy,” Ren said, and there was a fondness in his voice that made something pull tight and sharp in Hux's chest. Definitely not jealousy. “I know he is.”

“Still,” Hux said, coughing. “I would feel more comfortable if he was looked at. Plus, anyone aboard this ship needs to have medical records on file.”

“Well, you're his father, too,” Ren said, and the word sent a nasty, sick feeling rumbling down Hux's stomach. “It's your right. We can take him.”

* * *

 

Ren seemed to have no qualms about walking through the Finalizer cooing over an infant, though he did make sure to put his helmet on first. For appearance's sake. 

At first, Hux hoped that Ren didn't notice that he was standing several feet behind him, and then Hux realized that he actually _didn't_ seem to notice. He picked up his pace a tiny bit, ignoring the blatant stares from his subordinates. They could be reprimanded later. 

How did Ren look so _comfortable_ with this child, so quickly? Like he knew him intimately, as if he had actually carried him in his body for nine months. Hux brushed the random thought from his head before a mental image could truly form- the picture of a bloated, pregnant Kylo Ren might be enough to put Hux off sex for far longer than he would ever desire. 

All of the medical staff on board the Finalizer had been personally approved by Hux himself. They were discreet, and most importantly, they didn't ask unnecessary questions. Even when it was very, very hard for them. Hux could tell that was the case when Dr. Ilymus held out the baby in front of her, eyes wide but mouth in check. 

Hux was grateful for the propriety of his personnel. He didn't feel like explaining any of this.

She also did not say anything when Ren, excusing himself from the room to 'take care of some things', grabbed Hux's hand briefly and squeezed it, though Hux did think of he heard a small intake of breath from a nurse's aid on the other side of the room. And then Ren left them, but not without giving one more long, lingering look at the child. 

“I need you to do genetic scans,” Hux said, turning to the doctor as soon as the door shut. “Run them against our records. I need to find out who this child's parents are.”

“Lord Ren seemed to imply-”

“To hell with what Lord Ren implied!” Hux lowered his voice. “Confidentially, I think Lord Ren might be losing his mind.”

Hux could see the question on the tip of the doctor's tongue ( _losing?_ ), but she bit it. He sat in a chair in the corner of the room as they ran all of their tastes, watching every move so that a mistake could not be made. When Dr. Ilymus came to him with the results, baby in hand, Hux rose. 

“Well?”

She looked- reluctant. 

“We do have a positive genetic match." Hux's spirits rose. The guilty party could be found, and this whole matter could be put to rest. "The genetic match is for you and Lord Ren. Biologically, this child belongs to the both of you, and no one else.”

“That is _impossible_ ,” Hux hissed, and, for a moment, he thought that he understood Ren's need to lash out and destroy innocent equipment. “Doctor, you know that is impossible. Neither Ren nor I are capable of- he says he just _found_ it.”

“We tested twice, General,” Dr. Ilymus said. “He is your child. I don't know what else to tell. Maybe you need to have a discussion with your boyfriend.”

“Ren is not-” Hux felt his face turning hot. He couldn't really say that Ren wasn't his boyfriend, could he? They had sex, spent most nights together, cuddled and talked in the dark. And now, apparently, had a child together. 

“I will speak with him,” Hux said, and he jutted out two hands like he was being passed a bowl. It took some minor position adjusting before Hux was able to awkwardly hold the child. He knew that you had to support their heads, so Hux held his entire palm flat under the baby's head. Hux could not quell the minor current of terror that ran through him. _If you fuck this up even the slightest, you'll break its neck and that'll be it._ Damn infants for being so infuriatingly fragile. This was precisely why he had never deigned to hold one before. Hux had no patience for something so needy and breakable and terrifying.

“You'll be fine,” Dr. Ilymus said. “Something like this just takes an adjustment period. Sir.”

Something like this? What was _like this_? Hux started to reprimand her, but then realized he did not feel like dealing with her another moment, or the pity in her eyes, or the smirk of amusement on her assistant's face. “Right,” Hux said instead, and he turned to exit, walking fast so he could get it back to his quarters and into the safety of Ren's arms as soon as possible.

* * *

 

Hux had never imagined himself a father. He wasn't against the idea, per se, it just never really crossed his mind to consider it a serious possibility. He had known from a young age that he preferred men, so spontaneous fatherhood had never been a particular worry of his. (Until now.) He had never particularly valued romantic relationships, either- his eight month entanglement with Ren was by far the longest he had ever had. 

And now- this.

“Where the hell did you find nappies on a Star Destroyer?” 

“I sent out a crew to fetch some supplies,” Ren said, lifting up the child's legs so he wipe his bottom. He had the baby laid out on Hux's desk. Hux sat on his bed, mostly their bed, now, as Ren changed him. Ren just wore some loose black pants and a thin white shirt, his hair tied back loosely. He looked good, and with the baby in his care, he looked impossibly gentle. 

“Where did you learn to do that?” Hux asked, leaning forward and observing the way Ren tugged the adhesive straps around the side of the diaper. “I don't imagine you've spent much time around babies, but you seem so...” Natural. The word is in Hux's mouth, but he doesn't let it out, and he isn't exactly sure why. It would make Ren feel good, probably, and normally that is what Hux is all about. He holds back, though.

“Lieutenant Mitaka came by earlier, while you were working on the bridge. He has six younger siblings, you know. And three children. Did you know that he was married with three children?”

“Of course I did,” Hux said. “I know my crew. When have you ever cared about my crew?” 

Ren shrugged, picking up the freshly-changed baby and coming over to the bed. He spread himself on top of the covers next to Hux, laying the child in between them them. There was a rare smile on his face as he lightly tickled the baby's potruding belly with one finger. It made something in Hux go soft. 

“We're doing this, then.”

“Mmmhmm.”

“We can't keep calling him 'the baby', then,” Hux said, trying not to notice how beautiful and at peace Ren looked. “He'll need a name.”

“I actually had a few ide-”

“And can we agree to leave family names right out?” Hux said. “I have no desire for a Brendol III, and I'm not going to call my...son Darth Vader.”

“It could be Anakin,” Ren said, pout evident in his voice. “But fine. No family names.”

Ren looked back down at the child, inspecting him closely as if there was a name tag they might have missed. “I don't know many names that I don't already associate with other people,” he said. 

They spent the evening lying in bed in the dark, baby between them, reading names off of the holonet. 

“ _Alphonso_?” Ren's voice was a incredulous yell dialed down into a whisper, for sake of the sleeping baby next to him. “Hux, you cannot be serious.”

“It means _noble and ready for battle_ ,” Hux said, feeling his cheeks flush warm in embarrassment and frustration. “I thought it might be fitting. If you're going to be so picky, why don't you just choose something? You've turned down every suggestion I've given, but I don't think you've put forth your own in half an hour.” 

“I don't really care about meaning,” Ren said. “It just has to sound nice.” He paused. “Better than Alphonso.”

“There is nothing wrong with way Alphonso sounds, but that's not an argument I feel like getting into right now. It's already late. Just pick something.” 

Ren flipped his finger over the screen, let it shuffle down for a while before he jabbed another finger down. “There. What about Willem?”

Willem. 

“I like it enough,” Hux said.

“And it means _resolute protector_ ,” Ren continued. “Since I know meaning is so important to you, Alphonso.”

“I said I liked it,” Hux said. “No reason to try and push my buttons, Ren.”

“But I like pushing your buttons so much,” Ren said, grinning, leaning over to lay inelegant kisses at the base of Hux's neck. 

Between them, the newly christened Willem started to fuss, and when Hux shined the light of the datapad down on the baby, he saw that his eyes were opened. Ren pulled back and smiled down at the child, scooping him up without another word. “I got this,” he said, pressing the baby to his chest as he rose from the bed. He looked very attractive like that, Hux had to admit. Capable. Responsible. All manner of things he had come to not associate with Ren.

Maybe this would not be that bad.

* * *

 

It was that bad. 

Hux had a very strict sleep schedule. He usually slept seven hours every night, 2200 to 0500. Even with the addition of his relationship with Kylo Ren, he had still adhered to it with little wavering. Hux found structure very important in his everyday life, in both personal and professional capacities. A solid night's sleep kept him alert, able to do his job.

Willem woke up three to six times every night. He woke and he woke _loud_. And hungry. And even if Kylo was the one to shuffle out of bed to make him a bottle or change his diaper, which he usually was, just the movement and noise disrupted Hux and made it impossible for him to get back to sleep. 

He would pretend to be asleep, though, blankets clutched near his face and eyes squeezed shut as he listened to Ren speaking softly to the child and the child making little noises back at him. It liked Ren best, after all. Wil never made those little noises for Hux, just screechy noises followed by endless wails, as if he hated the look of Hux's face. 

“Long night, eh, General?” 

Hux turned around to see Lieutenant Witz grinning at him as if he expected a response. Hux was beginning to despise Witz, when before he had never particularly taken notice of him. Now Witz, who had never in his career history with Hux spoken out of turn, seemed to constantly be around, with unnecessary chatter and unwelcome advice. Quite a few people had taken him aside once news got around (which was quickly, as Mitaka had loose lips and Ren had taken to walking around the _Finalizer_ with the damn baby strapped to his front, professionalism be damned), but Witz was by far the most annoying.

Hux stayed where he was, hands clasped behind his back. “Do you not have a post to be at, Witz?” 

“I'm just off shift, Sir,” Witz said. “Wanted to see how you were coping.”

Oh, yes. That was right. Hux remembered that at some point in never-ending sprawl of this past week, which seemed more like one overlong day, he had switched Witz to gamma shift precisely to get him out of his presence. 

“My state of being is not your concern, Witz,” Hux said. “Have a good night.”

“I remember when Everi had the twins,” Witz said, as if he hadn't heard Hux at all. “I don't think I slept a single night the whole time I was off on leave. I was glad to come back aboard, even, though I'd forgotten how to get a proper night's rest almost.”

Hux wanted to reprimand the man for his horrible lack of insight, manners and professionalism, but he found that he couldn't find it in him. He was just so _tired_ ; the words weren't forming right in his head. Instead, he just nodded lamely as Witz continued talking, suffering in silent agony.

“Yep, no sleep at all. And don't even get me started on what else isn't going on in the bedroom.”

No.

“She hasn't touched me the same since they were born. When she does at all. A woman's body changes when she has a kid, though. It's not the same, and she's so focused on your kid that you kind of fall to the side. I get it, but a man has needs, you know?”

Hux wished for Ren's presence. He could still Force choke a man to death while wearing a baby, right? Hux would enjoy watching that very much.

“I don't know if it's the same with, you know. Two men.”

Hux would welcome an attack from the Resistance at this very moment. Just blow a massive hole in the side of the Finalizer and save him, please. 

He was instead saved by an alert on his wrist comlink. “I have to take this call,” Hux said. “Privately. In my office.”

He stepped away gratefully as Witz prattled on something about sleep training. Inside his office, he sat at his desk, letting his head slump down slightly on one arm as he answered it. If he could just close his eyes for ten seconds, it would help. He knew it. One, two, three, four, fi-

“So, Brendol, we hear congratulations are in order.” 

Hux blinked one eye open and stared at the projection of his father. Thinned gray hair on top with a somehow thick gray mustache, flicked with remnants of red. Another image pushed into view, his mother. With one eye closed and squinted, she looked the same as she always had, but as Hux straightened up and resumed use of his full range of vision, her age became obvious. 

“Mother, Father,” he said. “How did you- how were you informed? I am embarrassed that I wasn't the one to deliver the news personally, but it has been a very unusual circumstance.”

“Oh, Brendol,” his mother gushed. “Brendol, I thought you would never settle down and have a family. And with the Supreme Leader's special Force user! What a high profile match.”

Hux's head felt like it was spinning. The lack of sleep was making his thoughts especially slow. “Wait- what? Again, how do you know about this already?”

“We were informed by your partner,” Brendol, Sr. said. “A holoimage was sent.”

“What a lovely baby!” his mother said. “Such a sweet, chubby-cheeked thing. He doesn't look a bit like you, though, Bren. You were always so thin and dour.”

“Aurelia, please.”

“I mean it in the best way, of course, Bren,” Aurelia Hux said. “A mother always finds her child to be the most beautiful thing in existence. I had to remember that a lot, in the early days. Look how handsome you grew up to be, though.”

“Don't you want to know _how_?” Hux finally burst in. “And why?” Hux still wanted to know these things.

“Well, dear,” Aurelia said, her expression souring some. “That all seems a bit private.”

After assurances of sending more holopics and a promise of _yes, of course we will try to visit home on our next opportunity of leave_ that he had no intention of keeping, Hux tried to stand up from his desk and get back to the bridge. His body would not follow orders, though. He laid his head back down on his desk. Just for a moment. No one would notice.

He would close his eyes for two minutes and then get back to work.

* * *

 

They weren't hiding it from Snoke. That would have been pointless, and besides, they had nothing to hide. 

“He will be pleased,” Ren said, pulling soft black pants over Willem's diaper. They had both been called for a meeting with the Supreme Leader, and Ren was insisting that they bring their child along. “Our son is a sign of unity and strength in the First Order. He will be powerful in the Force. There is nothing to worry over.” 

“I am not worrying,” Hux said, worrying. “I just never particularly wanted to go in to a meeting with the Supreme Leader and have to be like, 'by the way, I have been fucking your apprentice. I hope that's okay.”

“He has been aware of the nature of our relationship.”

“What?”

“He had been aware of the nature of our relationship,” Ren said, picking Willem up and inspecting him. “How could you think he wouldn't know? He knows everything that we do. If he did not approve, we would have known well before now. So don't worry.” He turned and held the baby up for Hux's approval.

“He looks acceptable,” Hux said, eyeing a bubble of drool that had formed at the left side of Willem's mouth. “As long as he doesn't spit up all over himself.” Hux had known, of course, in theory, that children were messy. He had not been prepared, however, for exactly how messy they could be. Bodily fluids were not exactly his forte. 

“He won't,” Ren said. “He is eager to please the Supreme Leader. Aren't you, Wil?” 

Hux waited until Ren's back was turned to roll his eyes. Ren spoke to Wil all the time like that, as if he was going to answer back. It drove Hux insane, the pointless, forever unanswered questions. Of course the infant was not eager to please the Supreme Leader. He was an infant; he barely knew how to focus his eyes on something. He could shit and spit up and cry. No matter how much he insisted it was good for his _verbal development_ , which made complete sense, it just bothered Hux sometimes that Ren spent so much time talking to Willem. For no reason. 

Ren was not wrong about the Supreme Leader, either. He _was_ pleased. More pleased than perhaps Hux had ever seen him. It was rather infuriating, when Hux thought about it. All of the work and devotion that Hux had poured into the Order, and _this_ was what made Supreme Leader the happiest? A drooling baby who couldn't keep his head up. It was almost insulting.

“I think you're trying to destroy me,” Hux said later, standing over the crib while Ren was in the shower. If Ren thought talking to the baby was good for his verbal development, then talk he would.

Willem blinked up at him.

“You might not even know it, but I think you have been sent as a weapon of my undoing.” Hux possibly sounded a little mad. He couldn't tell, exactly, and Willem was not giving him feedback. “You might be causing me to lose my mind. I've been thinking about things Witz said to me and sometimes they don't sound completely idiotic. That is neither sane nor rational.”

If his tone had become a bit harsh, Willem did not recognize it. He just closed his eyes and scrunched his face. Hux braced himself for the scream, but it did not come. Instead, his mouth stretched into a sleepy yawn. 

Oh.

Ren walked out of the shower, towel slung around his waist but not his hair, so he was dripping everywhere, as usual. Hux was clutching on the bar of the crib, and he looked dumbly over at his partner, then back at the child, then back at Ren.

“He yawns like you,” Hux said. 

“Hmm?” Ren undid the towel at his waist so he rub his wet hair with it for a moment.

Hux looked back down at Willem, who seemed on the verge of falling asleep. “When he yawns,” he said. “He does that stupid thing with his face that you do, when you're really tired. With one eye scrunched shut and the other still kind of open.”

“ _Stupid_ thing with-”

Hux cupped Ren's damp face and kissed him. He leaned into the soft, warm skin of Ren's cheek and enjoyed his spice of his shampoo. “I love you,” Hux said into his neck, and it was something he had never said before, though he had thought it often enough. Ren stiffened for a moment, then relaxed. Hux felt the point of his chin against his shoulder. 

“I love you, too,” Ren whispered, and he was getting the shoulder of Hux's uniform all wet. Hux stood back, looked at the spot on his shoulder, then back at Ren, who had a completely dopey smile overtaking his face. Hux coughed, stepping away and undoing his belt so that he could change his jacket. 

“We need a nanny,” he said, avoiding looking at Ren so he wouldn't be tempted to kiss him again, tackle him down on the bed. He needed to get to work. If he let himself look at that smile for too long, he might not be able to. Opening his wardrobe, he tossed Ren some pants before selecting a new jacket for himself. “You can't keep carrying him around with you all over the ship. It's unseemly. And you definitely can't when you go on missions.”

Ren was leaning over the crib now. He did that a lot when Wil slept, just watching to make sure he was still breathing. “Can't you just watch him while I'm gone?”

“I cannot command a military with a baby strapped to my chest,” Hux said, opening his wardrobe. “And neither do I want to. I suppose I just don't have your confidence.” Ren didn't answer, and when Hux turned around, he was still looking down at Wil, reaching into the crib to stroke his black hair fondly. 

“You'll wake him,” Hux murmured. Ren just kind of hummed a no, shaking his head, and Hux stepped closer to him. He stood a little bit away as to not get his new jacket wet, but reached out and took the hand that wasn't in Wil's hair. 

“Say it again.” Ren's voice was a quiet whisper, but Hux could still hear the need in it.

“You'll wake him.”

Ren made a sound that was either a laugh or a groan, or both. He leaned over and gave Hux a careful kiss, making sure to touch him only with the press of his lips and nothing else. “You're an ass,” Ren spoke into his lips.

“I love you,” Hux said, conceding to Ren's request, only because he found it close to impossible not to say it again. The words felt written on every inch of his tongue now that he had finally said them, vibrating with a nervous energy that begged to be satisfied. He said it again, just in case once more was not enough to sate him for the entire course of his shift. “I love you.”

**Author's Note:**

> follow me at [machinewithoutfeelings](http://www.machinewithoutfeelings.tumblr.com)


End file.
